Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves
-Principle 4, How to Win Friends and Influence People, p.123 Continue reading Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves
Tag: Listening
Be on the lookout for Black Swans
In negotiation, there are those things we don’t know that we don’t know, pieces of information we’ve never imagined but that would be game changing if uncovered. Maybe our counterpart wants the deal to fail because he’s leaving for a competitor. Hypothesize that in every negotiation each side is in possession of at least three Black Swans. Always ask yourself: “Why are they communicating what they are communicating right now?” Sometimes, your counterpart might be oblivious to a Black Swan or unaware of its importance. –Never split the difference, p.219 Continue reading Be on the lookout for Black Swans
Who has control in a conversation, the guy listening or the guy talking?
The listener, of course. That’s because the talker is revealing information while the listener, if he’s trained well, is directing the conversation toward his own goals. –Never split the difference, p.160 Continue reading Who has control in a conversation, the guy listening or the guy talking?
Tactical empathy is understanding the feelings and mindset of another in the moment and also hearing what is behind those feelings so you increase your influence in all the moments that follow.
It is being able to think from another person’s point of view while they are talking and quickly assess what is driving them. Make a commitment to understanding their world. *Notice I didn’t say anything about agreeing with the other person’s values and beliefs or giving out hugs. That’s sympathy. -Never split the difference, p.52 Continue reading Tactical empathy is understanding the feelings and mindset of another in the moment and also hearing what is behind those feelings so you increase your influence in all the moments that follow.
You can learn almost everything you need – and a lot more than other people would like you to know – simply by watching and listening, keeping your eyes peeled, and your ears open, and your mouth shut.
Going too fast is one of the mistakes all negotiators are prone to making.
If we’re too much in a hurry, people can feel as if they’re not being heard and we risk undermining the rapport and trust we’ve built. -Never split the difference, p.30 Continue reading Going too fast is one of the mistakes all negotiators are prone to making.
In the early goings, make your sole and all-encompassing focus the other person and what they have to say.
Instead of doing any thinking at all about what you’re going to say. In that mode of true active listening – you’ll make your counterpart feel safe. The voice inside their head will begin to quiet down. The goal is to identify what your counterparts actually need and get them feeling safe enough to talk and talk and talk some more about what they want. -Never split the difference, p.28 Continue reading In the early goings, make your sole and all-encompassing focus the other person and what they have to say.
Remember, people want to be understood and accepted.
Listening is the cheapest, yet most effective concession we can make to get there. By listening intensely, a negotiator demonstrates empathy and shows a sincere desire to better understand what the other side is experiencing. -Never split the difference, p.16 Continue reading Remember, people want to be understood and accepted.
Better to have the world suspect you a fool than to open your mouth and put the matter beyond doubt.
Shut up and listen. -How to get rich, p.227 Continue reading Better to have the world suspect you a fool than to open your mouth and put the matter beyond doubt.
Encourage senior managers to go over annual results with you one-on-one
You will learn more from off-the-cuff remarks and opinions expressed at one-on-one meetings while looking over financial results than you will in a dozen board meetings. This tactic never fails to produce food for thought, often on both sides. -How to get rich, p.212 Continue reading Encourage senior managers to go over annual results with you one-on-one
Roadmap to Billions 